10 things you will learn at university

1. Your house is never as clean as when you have an assignment due.
2. The time you can go without having a shave is a lot longer than you think, three days can easily become three months when you don’t have your mother telling you to shave.
3. Wearing PJ’s to the shop is not only for chavs.
4. A one hour lecture is the most tiring thing ever and requires a nap afterwards yet an all day bender will make you feel wide awake.
5. Combining lots of foods is the greatest thing ever.
6. Noodles are your best friend.
7. No matter how poor you are, alcohol is always essential.
8. The university library is the easiest place in the world to steal toilet paper from.
9. You will lose all knowledge of the outside world yet somehow you will know everyone in your local.
10. A PHD does not equal intelligence.

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