It’s Festival-Season! – A girls guide to beer.


With Glastonbury taking place this weekend and us being representing by two members of the hashtagbeer crew,  (Matt and Adam – you better have a huge HastagBeer-flag on a pole next to your tent!) it’s time to talk about thee most serious festival matter ever. No, it’s not about how to keep a healthy diet because canned ravioli is totally part of a balanced diet and surely a welcomed break from your usual Ramen diet. Neither is it about what to do when you run out of toilet paper. Also, don’t expect any survival rules for when the camping area gets flooded. Man up! I said it’s about a serious matter: how to keep your beer cool for five days!

While people might slightly smile about that matter on the day of arrival, you will already see the first unorganized people craving a beer that isn’t the temperature of tea on the first day. On Saturday morning you can bet that at least three quarter of the festival-goers will have turned into cold-beer craving zombies. The easiest option is to turn to the sponsored beer stands and start drinking the sub par beer for hilariously high prices, Or if you are as poor or crave something a bit better better then read on.

The best you can do is to plan in advance, Bringing along a huge cooler box filled with ice and freezer packs will help to keep your alcohol cold, you can also use it to store barbecue meat and other foods. Also, you can buy them fairly cheap and if you take a little care and don’t leave them open for too long you can easily keep stuff cool for three to four days, especially when the outside temperature isn’t like that in Mordor.

Unfortunately, our beloved cooler box was stolen last year and will be dearly missed. that’s the problem with ice boxes: beer-zombies and unorganized jerks tend to steal them out of jealousy. The only solution I see here is to hide it in a separate tent on the next festival, A beer tent as it were.

Planning your camping days well in advance also means that you can bury a few bottles. The ground is cooler and will keep your beer cooler that not burying it. I admit that this method gets a little dirty in cases of flooding, though. But hey, it’s a festival. Live dangerously!

Obviously, as we’re talking about festivals, we can also get a little more creative: cool bottles down in an inflatable children’s pool filled with water. Optimize this idea by sitting inside the pool and cool yourself down a little, too. Someone’s got to supervise all this beer, right?!

Last but not least, and that’s basically the Sunday afternoon and evening method (also applies on Monday mornings if you really feel the need to drink a counter-beer after the festival weekend) when there’s really no ice left in sight: put your beer bottle in a sock, soak all of it with water and hang it in the wind. This great trick should help you cool down your beer in half an hour tops. And, if you’re not well organized, forgot your shovel or it isn’t windy enough to cool down your drink, then I have nothing left to say: don’t be a sissy and get used to your beer warm.

In case you’re not reading this from Glastonbury, here are a few European festivals you might still be able to attend this summer:
12.-14.7. – T in the Park (Balado, Kinross-Shire, Scotland) with The Killers, Rihanna, My Bloody Valentine, Travis, Ke$ha, …
18.-21.7. – Les Vieilles Charrues (Carhaix, Brittany, France) with Rammstein, Neil Young, The Hives, The Vaccines, Paul Kalkbrenner, …
5.-12.8. – Sziget Festival (Budapest, Hungary) with Skunk Anansie, Deichkind, Ska-P, Blur, Franz Ferdinand, …
23.-25.8. – Rock en Seine (Saint-Cloud, Paris, France) with Nine Inch Nails, Black Rebel Motorcycle Club, System Of A Down, Belle & Sebastian, Daughter, …
29.8.-1.9. – Zürich Openair (Zürich, Switzerland) with Arctic Monkeys, The XX, Two Door Cinema Club, Justice, Ellie Goulding, …

5 thoughts on “It’s Festival-Season! – A girls guide to beer.

  1. I’m just wondering why this is titled ‘A girls guide to beer’ from my understanding there are just as many clueless guys out there when it comes to drinking beer. In this day there are a lot more females aware of beer and having a title like that can come across as offenseive. In regards to your beer getting warm… some beer is better as it warms releasing aromas and tastes that you wouldn’t get because you’re drinking your beer too cold. Most beer is served too cold and against the recommended temp anyway….

    1. Its called a girls guide because its written by a girl, She writes something for us once a week. I post it under my username because she has a professional job and is worried about her employers finding out.

      You are very much correct, Their are clueless people in both genders, hence why were trying to appeal to both. This was not meant to call offense. We were going to do a beers you can drink warm post this week, when my fellow writers have fully recovered. is there any you would recommend?

      1. Understandable, the phrasing of the title just comes off as if you were directing it to women in general. From a first time readers opinion at least, when I read the title that’s what it seemed. No worries.

        As for recommendations, depending on your location. The beers I’ve been focusing on myself lately have been provincial and/or based in Canada.

      2. Good to know, i may look into changing it but Julia seems to like the title, currently we are based in Liverpool, Morecombe, Germany, France and Melbourne. Most stuff is coming from the uk at present though and really comes down to what i can get in my local supermarket, not many real ale pubs close to my house.

        Any Canadian beers i should be looking out for?

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